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Showing posts with label Inspiration_relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Inspiration_relationships. Show all posts

6.08.2009

Purpose and Tools for Getting There

Purpose and Tools for Getting There

Defining Purpose and Tools to get there.  GREAT Lucid Ideas  

I asked myself what my purpose in life is.  I couldn't figure it out.  So I asked, "Okay, what definitely IS NOT my purpose in life?".  I thought about it and said, "to wear socks -- my purpose on life is definitely NOT to wear socks."  That's great!! Why because that process of elimination helps define some crucial criteria for better solidifying and illuminating what I my purpose IS on the planet.  The logic behind "not here to wear socks" was because everyone can and does do it. Everyone wears socks, so my purpose couldn't possibly be to wear socks because it's not unique.  

Therefore, a key criteria for my purpose is that few people possess your aptitude and high-level skill in that purpose.  The purpose must be unique and of high-skill level so that very few (or maybe even no one) can do that purpose better than I.  If tons of people can do my "purpose" better than I can, then that isn't a purpose, that's a mere tool.  

Tools help improve, hone, and refine your purpose.  They're things your'e good at and are a qualified specialized skill, but a few others or much better than it than you, but certainly not everyone.

"Wearing socks" is an example of any person with a fraction of a brain can do.  Unlike tools, those "givens" require no special learning no brain power so givens are rarely mentioned.

Bottom line if you're REALLY REALLY good at a unique skill that only small number of people can do, it could quite likely be your purpose.  If you're good at a unique skill that's hard to learn but notice many others better than you, that's most likely a tool to help, chisel, enchant, and engineer exciting new dimensions to your purpose.

My Potential Purposes -- Activities/Skill in which I have a global high-caliber level of uniquely high proficiency

HAVE CHANNELED ALL THIS INTO COACHING!


Comedy
Acting
Life-Coaching
Romance with Women
Psychology -- Knowing people's emotions; understanding what people feel. 
Sensitivity to what people feel and what they express and share.

Tools -- Highly skilled areas that require a degree of skill that I possess. but areas in which others who possess such skills far out excel me.

Exercise self-discipline
Running, Biking, Swimming training and focus
Martial Arts wisdom, philosophy, and centeredness and piece of mind
Ability to write books
Perseverence and self-discipline to run marathons
Web Design skills and expertise
Computer science
Computer programming and logic
NLP 
recordings

5.24.2009

Get er Done! Why Sign and Utilize Contracts?


In the business, professional, internet, or any world with which you associate yourself. Professionalism, formality, closure and safety are all important. Read on to see why contracts move goals forward!

1. Formality. It adds to the REALNESS of the coaching relationship for BOTH the client and coach. As a coach I don't want some client joking around wasting my time if they aren't committed to changing. I take coaching VERY seriously. I've deliberately started and stopped smoking for 2 month segments specifically for the purpose of learning about the addiction so I could educate myself on how to help clients break it! I take coachign incredibly seriously and I need clients that are committed to changing as well! From the Client POV, I'm sure a sincere and focused client who' serious about achieving his/her goals WANTS a serious coach who's determined to make them realize their goals and potential!! A contract creates this formality to the coaching-client relationship.

2. Closure. A contract creates closure and certainty on the duration of the coaching. This is ESSENTIAL for goal-setting because it shows the coach and client how fast they ahve to move and what they will have time to cover or not. If the coach and client only have 2 coachign sessions, they'll most certainly have to focus on different things than if they had 10 coaching sessions. A contract creates closure.

3. Professionalism. This is the most simple and obvious reason for using a contract -- Professionalism! Real coaches, real clients -- real professionals, be it a businessperson, an actor, a performer, a therapist, anyone exchanging in a business agreement with a person who expects to get anything done, does work AFTER signing a contract.

4. Safety. Again, another obvious, but vitally important reason. Contracts ensure that expectations and needs are agreed upon and it provides the comfort of knowing that the client and coach both will provide the details of the exchange! From the service-provider point of view, this ensures you get paid, and from a client point of view this ensures you don't get ripped off! That mutual safety creates for a more lucid experience.

5.21.2009

Want to Mate, Men and Women? Be Confident for a Change!


I stumbled across a flirting, date "tip". This was phrased as a tip and it was about self-touch. It detailed that if a woman is interested in a man, she will touch her chest, leg.

I know (because I've dated women and we've discussed how they don't subscribe to that) that some women do not touch themselves ad a part of their body and then expect a man to obsequiously sidle up to her because of HER romantic interest. And as a male, I personally don't subscribe to that either. Why? Because the times that I observe with my fairly advanced body-language observation skills that a woman is doing some peculiar array of gestures and contortions that she is convinced is supposed to "express her romantic interest" (when in fact walking up to me and saying "I'm romanticlaly interested in you, want to chat?" would be the most phenomenal turn-on possible!) I was repulsed with how little confidence such a person has.

I guess my question is, doesn't that seem awfully reflective of the woman not having confidence? What's stopping the woman from boldly going up to a man that she's interested in and introducing herself? Why must she do this bizarre courtship ritual where SHE touches her self because SHE is interested in a man and instead of acting on HER romantic interest, she feels imprisoned in a set of cultural customs to passively "lure" her sycophantic romantic "prey" over to her? What percentage of women subscribe to such nonsense? I have absolute certainty that it's no 100% because I've met women who laugh at those tactics. What's frightening is that I think the percentage is quite high. In many ways, doesn't this passive, low confidence, indirect role that such a high percentage of women play ultimately condemn their outspokenness, their directness, their assertiveness in the relaitonship?

As homo sapiens were consciously are endowed with teh capacity to NOT resort to bizarre ritualistic courtship mating drills like the ones birds resort to that involve a flashing of colorful feathers and an exotic dance. As humans, we have the capacity to see the inherent ridiculousness in and the confining ramifications of courtship "drills" and even gender roles. And with our consciousness, we can live more full and complete and more importantly, more direct with our emotions in a way that relinquishes us from "moratorium of hte unknown".

"Club-winged Manakins, Machaeropterus deliciosus, reveal that males produce sustained harmonic tones through interactions among oscillating secondary wing feathers" in a courtship ritual. As conscious primates, we have the capacity to choose to NOT display a certain tone and oscillate our arms to convey affection, interest, or attraction. Instead, we have the capacity as humans to walk up to a member of the opposite sex and simply say with words the Nature of our interest in them! Don't you think it's time we've evolved? That it's time to relinquish antiquated courtship rituals that are literally inherent to a more primitive generation?

>>>>>>>>>>>


Doesn't that seem so unnecessarily confusing? I've seen women doing this and truly, honeslty, I thought to myself "that woman has an itch on her chest OR she's indirectly in a very muddled manner trying to get my attention because she's romantically interested in me.

I'm not a taxi driver! If woman touches her self romantically with the intention of "hailing me over for courtship", I don't stop and say "where do you want to go?" Because (to continue the metaphor) if she's failing to be direct, why should I -- HOW could I -- possibly be direct in my response to HER romantic interest?

Both woman and men need to take more confident ownership of their romantic interests.

Wait, do a lot of women SERIOUSLY suffer from the same low-confidence problems as men? Men do the Mystery Method etc PUA workshops because their confidence is low. I can see no different between That type of low confidence and the type of low confidence that causes a woman to passively touch a part of her body instead of having the confidence to approach a man with something are identical!

For me, personally, if I'm interested in a woman, I'll tell her. Or i'll directly ask what she seeks in a relationship (romance, friendship, merely chatting). I've just wasted too many years of my life stuck in the moratorium of the unknown because myself and the woman Both lacked hte confidence to address what kind of relationship was present.

So let's use this as an awakening to just boldly and confidently take ownership of our romantic interests. Why not? We have the capacity to do that as humans, right?!

>>>>>>

It's literally disgusting to me that people believe this rubbish. Utter, rubberish. This is preposterous! "Women are more in touch with feelings"? Please! Plenty of sensitive men out there that beg to differ. Men are better at 3-d perceptibility? Please, I'm sure there's some brilliant spatial designers that are female. ALL of these differences between men and women SIMPLY are the result of LOW confidence. Insecure males and insecure females flee and flock to the "Well, Thta'ts why he doesn't understand....our brains our different!" or the "Well, that's why she didn't communicate well...our brains are different" and then burrow themselves further into ignorance. Believing that men and female minds are different is -- it truly is -- a form of self-ridicule! It's ridiculing your own capacity to think as a human being by convincing yourself of the delusion that men and women are cognitively different. We're both the same species, we both have a need for sustanence, procreation, and shelter. Our brains cognitively function the exact same way. The "content" of what's in our brains and our personality and cultural background and personal perceptiosn of the world are undoubtedly different because there's so many different personalities and belief structures!! But to say that because one person has an XY chromosome and an other has an XX producing different reproductive systems, is in someway linked to the cognitive differences of the mind is truly and utterly preposterous! It's preposterous! Men and women have the same mind - a human mind!

It's truly foul and disgusting studies like these that perpetuate inequality in genders. These "false delusory trivias" are merely for the unconfident person to have ammunition in their ignorance and lack of confidence in dating in the first place!

Have you ever considered that there could be two reasons for a man or woman who have a romantic interest in each other to not date: 1) they're both too shy, timid, meek, and unconfident (this is about 95% of the reason why most of the time) or 2)they're both disgusted with how truly PUERILE the gender games have become!

5.15.2009

Is Everything for Romance? Even with Successful Careers





just woke up, just water, wore black (Great), no food, no coffee before, energizing awesome convo. good. I saw a darren brown and david tennant clip (for darren's tv show) and I relized that they went out into public to have a woman draw a picture and david was supposed to have predicted what she'd draw, but the interesting thing was how it almost seemed like david and darren were competing for the woman's attention to impress her! LOL these two HUGE awesome dudes and names (darren brown and david tennant) with huge massively successful careers, were almost primarily focused on this woman's attention. I mean i have a ton of respet for david, but my reverence for darren (he's just so gnalry) is off the charts, so seeing both these two extraordinary guys doing very unextraordiariny stuff (trying to impress a woman and have
vulnerability in that -- or maybe that is extraoridinary too!! ;D) was an eye-opener.

I mean Tennant is THE Dr. Who! How much more cool and successful and impressive is that from a sci-fi POV. And Darren....well that guy's just unfathomably cool and he represents the apex of all the skills in which I have been and currently training. So DB just operates on this unimaginably awesoem level of success. But so here were these two amazingly successful people whom I have massive respect for, doing something very common and normal -- kind of "flirting with a woman"!! :D These guys were just doing what any normal guy would do -- flirting with this woman! I mean I guess I figured at some level of success I erroneously thought you wouldn't have to worry about those htings (flirting, courtship, etc) but while I'm sure those guys don't worry about them, they still DO them. Romance is alive for every person regardless of their level of success. In many ways I htink romance is kind of the common denominator that makes someone's career or their image etc, operate from a baseline: yeah we are all human, we all have human emotions. Cool! But it was something to which I could relate. I could only look up to their careers -- wow, db's nlp skills insane! etc -- but when I saw them flirting with this woman, I was like "Hey!! Hey! Hey, I'm on the same level with them in that regard at least!!" :D

Realized that whatever level of success, romance and intimacy is still something that's very alive for people! And it just seemed these hugely massively successful careers, it's like that success got whittled down to just courtship, trying to impress, having a lot going for the sake of romance. VERY interesting. I guess the main insight was if I look at david and darren's careers, they seem pretty amazingly impenetrable successful, like intangible success like invulnerable success! But then when I saw them almost in this teasing, trying to impress mode, it made their careers a lot more connected and real and something that I could relate to! very cool!

4.11.2009

634 Contacts! 100% Pure, Premium Concentrated Contacts!


I had 634 which was INSANE. I whittled it down to 514, but still want to edit it and get rid of a lot. Felt awesome to sort through them (all electronic of course, Apple Address Book); if you still use paper non-electronic address books, don't even respond, you're too outdated. Wondered what criteria people use for saving/editing out contacts. I've got work, biz, friend, random project, old new contacts from everything; am structuring it so get the most use though.

I asked around and got answers like 14, 28, 59, and 25. So if the average is 40. I have over 15 times the "average" number of contacts. Hhhmm I am stoked to get my "oktokeep" category down to 200, but even 200 is a ton! It's exciting to have this many, but ideally there's a lot of contacts that resemble doors and projects that I have closed and have moved on from and may want to keep closed so editting those down would be incredibly wise. Additionally, having a more concentrated less diluted (all these contacts are relevant) is opportune and an incredible form of clarity. Additionally it's a matter of ensuring that you maintain awareness of which one's technically (like working phone number and/or email) and emotionally-socially (still relevant and positive in your life and career at the moment and many will NOT be relevant nor compatibile) work and still are compatible.

Looking through your contacts and not having an "baggage contacts" like "oh don't want to contact her...or that project's ended" is ideal to not have negative psychological energy connected up with contacts so sorting them out. Whittling my now 514 down to 200 or less would be incredibly energizing. Additionally

2.18.2009

Declining Invitations Gracefully

Staying On Top of the Game: Declining Invitations Gracefully

Treat every invitation as a mere compliment and that way declining the invitation is a lot easier to do!! When someone invites you to a group, a party, an event, or to be a member that's a MASSIVE compliment!! They're saying "hey, we like you, we can tell you're a good person, we want to interact with you more often or on a regular basis". So often very nice and grateful people find it difficult to decline invitations they can't accept for fear of it looking like a sock in the gut in the face of "great praise of an invitation". Therefore, merely treat each invitation as a simple huge compliment to which you say "Thanks!!" and act incredibly grateful toward the compliment aspect of the invitation!! But most importantly do that AFTER you decline. How you end is emphasized when communicating so end with the praise, on the upbeat. So immediately say "Oh I'd love to, but I can't. But you guys are soo awesome wow!! Fun times for sure!! Jeez great group of people!" So you get it clear that you decline the invitation but then you smother that declination with praise and herald and more gratitude again, so the part about you that people like -- the grateful, appreciative, respectful, loving part -- stays on even keel, stays emergent, stays in the game.

Why is the skill of declining an invitation so vital to remaining positve, focused, clear, and ontrack with your own goals?? Possessing the skill to effectively and gracefully decline inclinations is essential to achievement.

1.20.2009

Souther California Random Research -- Random People Connections

What's amazing to me is how so many people are connected. I was reading up on Malibu and came across Santa Monica Daily Press. GREAT magazine. And there was an article on Roman Polanski and learned that his wife Sharon Tate was murdered by Charles Manson, which is really fucked up. And Owen Wilson lives in Malibu and has been declared part of the "frat pack" the zoolander cast of comedy actors. All of this research stemmed from reading up on Australian History earlier to day and getting 5/5 100% on teh Australian citizen test. And then learning about how Charlie Sheen and Emilio Estevez are brothers is another weird Coincidence. It's just weird how all these people in california in the sub-zones are related in backstory or something.

The Manson thing was really fucked up and disturbing. Apparently the guy got a bunch of drugged up hippies and disgusting losers to have Beatle album names to plans kind of like Fight Club actually but to murder people out of some distorted view of a racial war. Just a sick disturbed, loser pathetic, vile freak.

It was disgusting reading about that, but I realized that I do a lot of things to avoid being bad or fucked up. It's GREAT not to be vile or fucked up, but I should be focusing on thing that I want, not what I don't want. A LOT of my past emails and communications with people have a construct of being polite and cordial for the purpose of not wanting to appear disorganized. It doesn't work when you put effort into NOT being like something, gotta move towards something. Be something.

The GREAT article was the one about civil rights having shown its face, as Santa Monica Daily Press put it, at 1600 Pennsylvania. haha. Another wild thing I noticed was how the white house map looked like a raid instance!! haha.

Also the RHCP singer Frusciante used to live in Venice along with nicholas cage. Realized that there's "stars" in EVERY profession -- physics, dentistry, law, acting, biology, teaching etc. Just people doing a job.

1.27.2008

Trusting Intuition and Engaging Only Trustworthy People

Trusting and Most Importantly LIVING OUT your Intuitive Knowings and Understandings
The crazy and most disturbing and frustrating thing about no resources in Chicago, is that I KNEW that back in 2006 when I went to CA. I knew I didn't want to go back to Chicago and when I went to my CC graduate and then on to LA, I had set in my mind that I was done with Chicago. But then biological family and other people contradicted that personal conviction. I think my uncle, my dad, my mom, etc. thought I'd be better back in Chicago. The best thing to learn from that (after spending a year CONFIRMING my original observation and truism -- that I'm done with Chicago) is HOW can I validate to such an extent that I don't let other people's views or beliefs get in my way. Life would be terrible if you KNEW things (like being done with Chicago), but then had to spend a year "validating that conviction for others". I tried my best in chicago to make it work, but knew in the back of my mind that I had made the decision to not come back to it. This created confusion. When people ask "where I'm from", I just tell my story of feeling like CA is home, having been physically born in chicago, but don't really know what to say! I think the best lesson is, when someone gives you advice on something that contradicts a personal, sincere decision you've made, then SHARE that decision! An example was when my grandmother told me not to take the care to the Thanksgiving celebration in Walla Walla. I had planned to do that and she contradicted my decision. It's great and okay to have people that contradict your decisions, but just ensure that you just look at that as "awareness of a disagreement" and not as evidence that you need to change something about your life. That's refreshing. Another example: I didn't tell my parents that I had made the decision to not go back to chicago. So I think a goal of mine should be expressing the why and how I have certain convictions about what I want to do with my life. That will accelerate my success. It's like I know, better than anyone else in the world, what I've done and where I will most likely have success. That makes sense, right? I mean how could someone else -- no matter how close -- without knowing all of my experiences, choices, emotions, and "how I work" possibly EVER "know" how I can create success for me, better than myself? Such a possibility is nearly inconceivable. Granted, many people DO seem to know me well and offer incredibly validating and aligning advice (like yourself), but ultimately you are the person who knows best. I feel like I've spent a lot of my life doing things that I know wouldn't work but enduring them because other people felt they would work (seeing shrinks, going back to chicago, etc. are examples). I've been forced to see 8 shrinks (some were great friends, some were the epitome of a problematic people), but I NEVER voluntarily chose out of my own volition to see any of them. It's time to start operating from volition and just making "a mental note" of others views or contradictions to that. I feel like my parents are tied into this, like my dad thinks he knows what's best for me and I trusted that more than I trusted my own convictions. I don't think one should ever do that. That all goes back to Saying No!!! If you can effectively say no, you end up sharing your convictions with people and don't do things that are contradictory to your life.

In fact, the past year in Chicago -- with all the things I've done for other people (therapy for parents, spectator/audience for friends' bands, brothers games, parents business events, meeting with other contacts, etc. etc. -- I just look at as Pure Service. I mean doing peace corp in Africa would be close to a vacation! Because I'd actually get official credit for that service with that program. I don't seem to have acquired that in Chicago. But it's great to know how I've classified the past year with Chicago; it's simply been one big selfless act of service. That's the only thing, for me at least, to do in Chicago! Great, that was good. But now that's done. No more selflessness, just my life, my success.

Others' Performances and Saying No = Non-Mandatory Events
You're SOOO right about saying no. Saying yes for fear of hurting the others' feelings, creating disappointment, or for fear of altering how they view and think of you. Looking it at that way I suddenly realize we just have hundreds of "invitations" (to buy this, go to that, say no to that, go in this door, out that door, etc.) to do things throughout life but NON of them are mandatory!!! You don't have to go to anyone's stuff, if you don't want to, but I still do. I'm seeing my friends' band Cobalt for the 4th time tonight. They're great, but again, its an example of yet another thing that is me spectating someone else's successes someone else's performance, when what I really want to be doing is DOING my performance, my event, that's scheduled and people are there to see John. That's not the case with going to see the band. Everyone's there to see cobalt, which is great. It's their event, just like my brothers' track and basketball games are about him, and my parents Innovation Awards were about them. I find it unsettling that I went to all of those events for them, but no one came to my college graduation except for all the students with whom I was graduating with, which was great.


Scammed Again!
I really do trust people too much. I got scammed big time. I don't understand how and why this keeps happening to me, but it must stop. This club in Chicago, Transit, charged 100 to my card, when I only bought 2 ($10 worth of drinks). I'll never go back to that place and NEVER have a concash bar tab, and hopefully with have less and less or ZERO bar tabs from now on, ever! Then on the way back from the club, the cabby scammed me for money by charging me $8.45 and then taking and additional $5, saying the card didn't go through (when it did). That was scammed and ripped off twice, in TWO totally separate incidents, by totally different people! I hate this city, I'm through and am moving to Nature. We all have our individual events and experiences that cross our lives, but I've been scammed more than most people I know. I really can't trust anyone. If you had a ton of experiences where people helped you out and never conned you, you could have a different relationship to trust. But if you're by nature, overly trustworthy, like me, and have been conned, ripped off, and stolen from, on so many times, you MUST have a different relationship to trust. In other words, one's level of trust should reflect their experiences to an extent. If you've been ripped off a lot, that's a Beautiful indicator that you need to be MUCH less trustworthy. If you've been ripped off and stolen from as many people as I have, you've been trusting the greedy, conniving, and wrong people. Before you trust, you have to create as much verification to ensure a person and/or group is aligned with your beliefs, is benevolent, genuine, and altruistic like you, because that's the way you are, and greedy thieves actually Exploit benevolence in people. It's bad enough that they lack benevolence, but the fact that they actually exploit benevolence of others, is just sickening. Saints shouldn't mingle with swindlers. haha! But I've actually trusted those people with a "blind belief" in humans in general. Like I said, we all have different relationships with trust, based on our personal experiences. If you have never been scammed or conned, you probably don't' have to worry about being overly-trustworthy. I, on the hand, have to reduce my level of trust with people drastically. This has been a blessing -- all these ripoffs, and thefts, though -- because it's shown me that everyone is not like me. Everyone is not obsessed with altruism, benevolence, sharing, and genuine exchange. In short, many people are NOT trustworthy. These have been invaluable lessons, because it's forced me to create a system that ensures that I deliberately exclude toxic, untrustworthy people from my life (I'm not talking about "liars" everyone fibs now and then, I'm talking about people who seriously lack honesty, exploit benevolence, and are only concerned with their material gain) and focus on engaging with and only with awesome, uplifting, trustworthy, altruistic people.

This city is so filthy and vile because it's full of scamming, disgusting, putrid con artists. I'm leaving this hell hole as soon as possible. EVERYONE abuses, exploits, and steals from me here. If you don't see why it's understandable to feel unsafe here -- it's an UNSAFE place!! -- then you're blind. Wow, I'm going to be so excited in a place that's warm and honest and not heartless and cruel. No wonder I've been so panicked in Chicago! I haven't' been surrounded by the benevolent, joyous, creative, spiritual people that I crave. No, I've been surrounded by conniving, greedy thieves! That's truth! So I'm looking forward to being around some great, benevolent, good, healthy people. Also, another lesson I learned is 1)rarely ever use your debit card for anything and 2)when you do ALWAYS carefully scrutinze the receipt before you sign it. That scam artist STOLE my grandmother's birthday check she gave me ($100). No use in lingering on this and being angry, I just have learned those 2 valuable lessons and will abide them. This creates a BIG distinction. I always want to be stay optimistic and never want to have a curmudgeonly view that "no one should EVER be trusted", but on the other hand, I shouldn't continue doing things the way I've been doing them and get slammed again and again by conniving, greedy rip-off people. So it's a great defining time to develop SINCERE and deliberate criteria for never trusting untrustworthy people and then somewhat relaxing around genuine, trustworthy, honest, and benevolent people.

I'm pretty mad that I lost my money, but I'm even MORE disgusted and shocked at how pathetic these people are who purposefully scam others to whittle out some extra bucks. Like their agenda is to purposefully steal from others to make their own life improved. Why am I a saint among demons? Where are more people like myself? I'm looking forward to living with people who are trustworthy, benevolent, spiritual, and as obsessed with altruism and servitude as I am. Whenever I feel uncomfortable around people and feel fearful of them, I should TRUST that! I must just listen to that intuition and avoid those people at all costs. Usually that initial fear or discomfort is so subtle, though. I can really do without more of the "learning lessons" .

All of this is a SERIOUS life-learning learning, MASSIVE critical mass realization that's changed my life forever and moved me towards connecting with only trustworthy people. Was there a pattern to all the cons? Was it primarily men or women? No, no gender discrimination. It's just city people. City people are untrustworthy. Where are my friends, Thoreau and Emerson and Einstein? Where are the genuine, selfless, people like me? Wow, I've really just seen a darker side of the world and know that I only want good, genuine, benevolent people in my life.

1.23.2008

The Tragic Loss of Heath -- A Profound and Deep Actor

The tragic loss of Heath. This is shocking; it’s unbelievable. I feel partially mourning, partially stunned. He was an incredibly composed and immensely talented actor. My favorite role of his was in “Lords of Dogtown” as the Venice Beach “skate-boarding king”. But this, according to his father, “tragic, untimely, and accidental” incident brings with it a huge host of concerns. Did Heath become too consumed by his work? His dark projects as a heroin addict or a suicidal character? Did he ever do an emotional “check-up” after his break up with Michelle Williams? Reports say he couldn’t sleep and couldn’t “stop thinking”. Acting takes more then resilience and perseverance. It demands tremendous clarity and profound determination of the will. I’m not saying Heath didn’t possess that, at all. But what I am conveying is you have to build your foundation first.

You have to focus on your spirituality, your emotional management, you have to understand your intrapersonal knowledge, and focus years on your dreams, goals, authentic likes and dislikes before committing to a profession as tidal and tortuous as acting. We must NEVER let our work and career or relationships with other people (regardless of how intimate) ever stand before or eclipse our emotional freedom and peace, spiritual identity, and mental clarity. If you commence a full-time acting career without an infinite awareness of the your own spirit, and a tried-true-and-tested system for keeping your life organized and your core values aligned, the profession will feel like a dangerous Tsunami. Any profession to which we commit must always come secondary or tertiary to understanding our spiritual place and identity, your emotional capacity and sensitivity, and your ground-level life management skills.

We should mourn Heath’s death, but use this as an opportunity to re-evaluate our life and ensure that we perpetually meet an enormously high requirement of staying inspired and emotionally, mentally, and most importantly, physically healthy. We can learn to look at death differently by appreciating life. We must also be reminded that life always has the winning hand to death. Additionally, we must demand that our social, peer, and close friend group is intuitive, nurturing, and inspiring, but all while deeply understanding that only we can create peace for ourself. Great poet and essayist, Ralph Waldo Emerson writes, “Only you can create peace for yourself. You can only create peace through the triumph of principles.”

So after so many captivating and incredible, but bleak, dark, and emotionally-testing roles, let’s hope that Heathy Boy is now exploring his “lighter and more blithe” characters in the Heavenly Theatre of an Aussie Paradisio.

1.06.2008

Trust

Being one of the most integral components of a functioning human relationship, trust creates harmony, but too much of it engenders dangerous vulnerability. A healthy amount of trust allows two or more humans to experience openness and congruence with one another. From this one learns the benefits of altruism, the joy of selflessness, and warmth of giving. Furthermore, an inadequate amount of trust creates a conscience lacking in warmth and expression, riddled with conspiracy and checkered with subterfuge. Nevertheless, if one resorts to any extreme of trust – too much of it or too little of it – one could experience lack of defense or paranoia, respectively.

Vulnerability not only creates openness to love, but it creates susceptibility to attack. Aggressively mendacious and belligerent people, unfortunately, do exist. Being wary of engaging too much is being conscience of psychological predators in the world. However, if one becomes so depleted of trust that excessive paranoia sets in, this could be considered a more viciously unhealthy malady than excessive or uncalculated trustworthiness.

The fine median is to be meticulous with our trust. With a dubious person, or when your intuition is on alert, be miserly with your trust. Play it safe. However, one should never universally apply a method of frugality in regards to trust because trust opens the door to vulnerability, and it is the fusion vulnerability combined with a commitment to dynamism that creates a synergistic experience.

1.01.2008

Society Vs. Culture

In his famous book, “Future Shock”, Alvin Toffler wrote, “Society is a wave. The wave move onwards, but the water of which it is composed does not”. In other words society is warped; something about it isn’t natural, it isn’t right. Waves cross thousands of miles of open ocean fetch expanse, carrying water from storms on the other side of the globe. That’s what waves do; they carry water. The societal wave does not do that. It is a mutant “wave” of stagnant immobility. It’s a distorted entity that has forgotten its core roots. Society has forgotten it’s heritage.

Society is merely progeny of culture. Culture is infinite, while societal is constructed, man-made, materialized. In short, society is finite. When you think of society you think of restrictions and permissions of what you can do and what you can do based on the amount of prizes you’ve “earned”. Of course you don’t earn the prizes in any way different than a preschooler earns a gold star by coloring in the lines. Culture, carrying myths and stories and history from the end of time, is boundless. Society is a hierarchy with no personal history. Joe Schmoe and Abraham Lincoln carry as much importance in humanity in culture; for they are both humans that lived. In society, however, Joe Schmoe’s life -- his challenges, accomplishments, trials and tribulations -- go unacknowledged. Society, therefore, is the naive child of the grander scripture, culture. Society is various parts and linearly components that myopically function together. The stories, myths, traditions, and heritages compose parts integral to culture, but together, the cultural components create a gestalt. Society blandly constructs parts to complete a whole, while the infinite culture is the grand picture, synergistically larger than the original painting.

By the way, if these words irk you, dear reader, then read on, for these truisms exist for you. They exist not to rile your bile, but to stew you to eschew that vacant grasp on what many call “society”.

An essential component of of all societal citizens is to forget their culture ancestry. People living in society have abandoned their roots for the sake of finite prizes, titles, bureaucratic shenanigans. Society thrives under the veil of false necessity. Citizens become deluded into thinking they need society, when all they need, all their intrinsically interact with is culture. Society is the maya, the illusion, concealing the infinite boundaryless culture. Why has this sham perpetuated? Simple, society awards prizes (titles, honors, prestige, which lead to new finite game titles) to those who perpetuate the veil of society. We’re made to believe that the president of a corporation, or president of a country, or some grand Nobel award is something worthy of a life devotion. In reality, such belief -- devoting your life to a relationship with society -- is about as pragmatic trying to shake hands with a shadow; you’re left with nothing but emptiness.

“Anyone can participate in culture -- at anywhere and at any time.” (Carse 43). The fragile, teetering mesh of immigration paperwork, the visas, the greencards, the documentation, the redtape all prohibit and complicate society. Society, therefore, is an in-egalitarian club -- and a cheesy club at that. Society can exclude and preclude at the drop of a hat, or more precisely, with the flicker of a pen. Culture, on the other hand, has that indelible acceptance intrinsically woven into it’s artistic fabric. The only thing culture prohibits is prohibitions!

“The rules of a finite game may change -- the rules of an infinite game must change.” (Carse) Therefore, we must learn to create certainties with our life, and then assure ourselves that we must not demur, for everything has that mutability. The wise, therefore, only holds one single certainty: that nothing has certainty.

Now Einstein seems to have anti-parrellel contradictions to the deceptive nature of society because he says “Man can find meaning in life only through devoting himself to society.” However, despite his greatness, his expansive and inhumanly creative intellect, and his mathematical genius, I think our dear originator of relativity was in err. He meant to say, ““Man can find meaning in life only through devoting himself to culture.” After all, Einstein did not invent his paradigmatic creations and write his world changing papers for the German Society, for his “fuhrerland”. Nah, he wrote, quite literally, universal theories for the culture of mankind. In fact, when many criticized him for the destruction over Hiroshima, he overtly exclaimed that the Manhattan project was an atrocity. Still, fellow theoretical physicist, Stephen Hawking, said that blaming Einstein for the atom bomb would be like blaming “Newton for the gravity that causes airplanes to crash. Einstein took no part in the Manhattan Project and was horrified by the explosion.” Being versed in the universal language of mathematics, Einstein was a cultural genius of physics, mathematics, and space-time discovery. He didn’t apply his advanced mind for society; societies bomb and destroy each other in their finite games. Culture is expansive and universal.

11.30.2007

True Love Is Psychotic

True love, that genuine rare art form, is ultimately psychotic. Learn to love the wild. Embrace the rifts, tides, and currents of that change. Create your unknown and then live to understand your reality. Truth is subjective; discover your own wisdom and comprehend the desires of your intrinsic beauty. This should function as a wake-up call for all your music. No more snooze or booze; time to use your capacity for that rhythmic sagacity.

11.12.2007

Consecrated Congruence

If you engage guile about serious issues, you're also engaging apathy. Using guile facetiously is fun, clever, and amusing, but about serious pursuits, guile becomes deceptive and slaughters authenticity while emerging apathy. Apathy precludes any and all opportunities of congruence. Congruence, to some people like Carl Rogers, is literally consecrated. It's like sanctified. Congruence opens direct conduits for healthy, genuine exchange with people. We've got to engage economically-compassioante congruence. What this means is if someone's debilitating or creates disbelief of auspicious things or has inauspicious vibes, we should disavor congruence. Then if you respect a person AND they generate propitiously healthy belief fortitudes for you, cultivate congruence with those and only those people.

10.30.2007

The 4 Steps to the Seduction Process

DISCLAIMER: Quality seduction -- authentic seduction -- is not about exploitation, but, rather, fulfillmnet. The seduced are left with realized desires and long-kept fantasies are brought to the surface. Genuine seduction, therefore is a form of life empowerment, leaving one with new and expanded horizons.

  1. Seduction fulfills the consciously unacknowledged need or craving -- seduction listens to the unspoken desire. Everyone has psyche gaps and cravings.
  2. Your inner voice needs air to breathe. That inner voice frequently lusts out and is always lurking beneath the surface of your psyche.While you pine away talking about, for example, your pampered, comfortable childhood, your inner voice squirms and twitches for something esoteric, wild, and forbidden. We constantly give subconscious signals as to what we lack.
  3. The essence of the seduction process, therefore, involves deciphering and psychological cryptology. We conciously and unconsciously conceal and disguise our desires and lacks.
  4. Mastering this principle will provide you with 2 things: 1)The ability to clearly see desires in others and 2)The ability to continue providing for others without reverting to selfishness. Don't assume others want what you want and lack what you lack

1. Everyone has psyche gaps and cravings.

If we didnt' have psychich gaps and complex cravings all of our "human code", our inner workings would be in a database. We would be automatons without hidden, psychic mystery. What's an example of something that interacts with humans and can "appear" like it makes choices, but has zero unknown cravings and unkowns. Only computer programs have no hidden gaps and cravings. Fortunately, humans each have our own millions of lines of "code" detailing our own inner cravings and no one is aware of that code themselves and others never see all of it. That's what makes us human. Seduction, therefore, is a bit of programming and deciphering, and clarifying. It's really just clarifying these desires people purpsoefully or unconsciously neglect. Seduction fulfills the consciously unacknowledged need or craving -- seduction listens to the unspoken desire.


2. We constantly give subconscious signals as to what we lack.

Everyone has a voice. They use this normal voice to speak to a friend, to order pizza, th tell the cabby where they're going. But everyone also has an inner voice. Unless you're a musician, successful author or speaker, you likely have this voice still deeply buried in your life. It needs air to breathe. That inner voice frequently lusts out and is always lurking beneath the surface of your psyche. Do you always have a demanding "normal voice". If you're always demanding, what prevents you from serving? If you're constantly focusing on beauty and physical appearance, your inner voice longs for intellectualization. While you pine away talking about, for example, your pampered, comfortable childhood, your inner voice squirms and twitches for something esoteric, wild, and forbidden. The more you desensitize yourself to your own inner cravings (by fulfilling them, so you actually become more interested in others having fully fulfilled yourself), the more obvious the inner voice of others will become!


3. We conciously and unconsciously conceal and disguise our desires and lacks.

When you understand that you, I, them, her, he -- all of us -- are only half aware of our little quirks, desires, wants, lacks, and cravings and deliberately try to hide some and unconsciously hide others, we begin to understand how much of a puzzling mystery the whole seduction process becomes. No one has a huge sign on them that says "To seduce me, follow A, B, and C. And then...". The essence of the seduction process, therefore, involves deciphering and psychological cryptology. Proper seduction involves thorough scrutiny of the person's past romances, their homes, their belongings, what do they like to listen to, what time of the day are they most aroused? do they have routines? or do they thrive in spontaneity? All of these personality quirks and answers to those questions lie embedded in the messages of their clothes, appearance, phrases, past stories, and homes. They, themselves, may not even be consciously aware of some of the desires you envision. One of the best film adaptations of the most master-mind seduction artist I have ever seen was Val Kilmer in the movie "The Saint". He played a woeful heart-torn poet, he wooed Elizabeth Shue's character with nobility and depravity and creativity and turmoil. The Rescuer constantly needs to help other's problems, if you constantly have problems in life, the Rescuer will be drawn to you. Again, we all have our little decipherings that formulate our subtle interests and desires and social needs.


4. Don't assume others want what you want and lack what you lack.

This last principle is essential. Mastering this principle will provide you with 2 things: 1)The ability to clearly see desires in others and 2)The ability to continue providing for others without reverting to selfishness. Most of us fail at seduction because we are unable to escape the prisms of our own mind, our own desires and lacks. If you've been pampered your whole life, you assume everyone wants wild adventure, too. If you're prude and "above" romance, you assume everyone else is more interested in style and fashion, too. If you obsess intellectually and yearn for physical intimacy, you assume everyone has the same craving. Those three examples are all erroneous! Do not create those assumptions. Secondly, when we cease assuming others want what we want, we will have greater awareness of a person's ability to actually provide what we want! If you're seducing a a seductee who has numerous exotic fetishes, and you just want a simple long relationship, you'll realize that you may not get what you want out of such a relationship right away. Knowing that, predicting the outcome, can assuage unpleasant emotions and provide your sense of knowing with greater trust. You'll trust your ability to foretell what the other person lacks and, resultingly, you'll acquire more and more confidence in your ability to provide that vacancy for the person.

9.24.2007

Sprinkle People

I like to include everything in a single email, but wanted to add this:
I am definitely the "imprisoned celebrity", "land-locked-soulseeker" , now.


There is a key and completely essential distinguishing characteristic between financial currency and spiritual currency: you survive with financial currency, but you truly live with spiritual currency. This is not saying to discard financial currency because clearly, without basic survival needs you would be suffering. But so few people ever actually truly live - live their dreams, access their potential, and enjoy the articulation of their talents. A psychologist Maslow came up with the idea of self-realization, realizing your highest potential. In his analysis he defined things called D-needs, or deficit needs, that were basic buildings blocks need to construct a platform from which you could start your self-actualization process. The basic physiological health (food, nutrition, sleep, 98.6°F body temp.), only get you to the starting point from which you can start the self-realization process. To plug in financial currency and spiritual currency, you need financial currency to fulfill those deficit needs - the basic survival needs - so that you arrive at the oasis of self-realizations from which you can use spiritual currency to truly access and activate your dreams. To use an example, if the exploration of outer space our galaxy, solar system, and universe is truly living your life and discovering your dreams, which you do with spiritual currency, then breaking the surface of the earth's atmosphere is the purpose and the limit of financial currency.
But that's precisely the problem and the benefit of spiritual currency. So few people make it to the surface - fully satisfy all their deficit needs - and what's worse is that those few who are fully "surviving" - that is have all their basic necessities - rarely even consider trying to pursue the dreams with spiritual currency. Or the reverse happens, someone is adamant about spending spiritual currency, but they lack the survival necessities to break the surface. If they had enough financial currency to generate the necessary survival needs (food, health, loved ones, shelter, etc.), their mastery of spiritual currency would propel them far into uncharted "depths of their galaxy of dreams and potential". The person who grasps financial currency but either neglects, is unaware, or simply is afraid or lazy of exploring life and using spiritual currency is the "Comfortable Obdurate". That person is stubbornly only comfortable with their basic survival needs. The person who has the mastery, motivation, courage, and knowledge of spiritual energy to truly realize his or her dreams but lacks the financial currency understanding or resources to get to the plateau of self-realization, is the "Land-locked soul-seeker" or the "Imprisoned Celebrity". This person seeks his soul but is land-locked by absence of financial currency awareness, or the person has the aspirations and dreams and no how to truly spiritually aligned and even famous, but they are imprisoned by their lack of financial currency and survival needs. This person is going incessantly going spiritually 60 mph in neutral.
The mastery of financial currency and awareness, courage, and knowledge of spiritual currency is the key to success in life. Those two "economies" are massive concepts, but comprehending and fulfilling them is, most certainly the simplest way to life fully. Understand and master those two areas and you will not only be successful to the world, but successful to yourself because your accomplishments will generate so much personal satisfaction, compassion, joy, sense of achievement, and happiness having grown from your creative, rich essence.



Another interesting realization I've had is that relationships are NEVER black-and-white, they're all grey area. Women are attracted to strong men, but then like to control them to assert their feminine power, but then are no longer attracted to them if they succeed in the satisfying display of feminine power. Or, some men are attracted to manipulative women, but then are simultaneously confused and repulsed by her trickery. That's all grey area. I think it's important to look at ALL relationships, because of the inherent grey area, as "no big deal". Anytime you try to stamp black-and-white confienements, or demands, or rules, or contracts on a human relationship you either restrict humanity or set yourself up for a whole hellish heap of confusion and shattered hopes. That's why relationships should be fun and nothing more. They must not be "vessels" of hope, nor time-vaults for safe-keeping. I know many people who've invested their valuable time (and money) in relationships expecting the relationship to "keep it safe". Ha! Then the "relationship" runs off with another partner or splurges on an expensive car. Relationships are fun trifles and should be treates as thus and nothing more. "Only you can create peace with the triumph of principles," writes Emerson. I'm finally understanding that. You have to invest in YOU, in your principles, in your beliefs, and make that the first and foremost thing in life. Then relationships are the sprinkles on top.

I, like many others, have made the blunderingly difficult and stupid maneuver, of treating relationships like the epicenter of my life' focus. Treating a relationship like its the keystone of your life is like trying to build a bridge on quicksand, or about as intelligent as taking your wieght only after thanskgiving or after running a marathon -- you set yourself up for inaccuracy and work from inherently shaky ground. The keystone of your life (if such a thing exists, which it doesn't) must revolve around you. The only ground you control is your own, the terrain of your own principles, so, therefore, yourself is the only "building place" worthy of utilizing as a foundation. Any other resource -- a relationship, a friendship, a business connection, involves someone else's principles, someone else's unpredictability, and, therefore, those "foundations" are plausible unstable. Again, the only foundation is yourself. Business affiliates, relationships, even intimate lovers are all sprinkles in life.

What happens when we externally cling and grasp and turn relationships into keystones?
We downward spiral. A relationship hits a bump and we scream out in the night, ask "why me?" constantly, pray to God for faith, and bathe in a murky, dark, illusion called self-denial. In denying our downward spiral, we grasp on to more relationships, beckoning out to more people, until you become a hideous parasite; a leech that repulses people, but simultaneously deeply (erreneously) believes he "needs" people in some way. In short, when we grasp and treat relationships as keystones in our life, we become a decrepid, hollow, dissatisfied sham. Worse, people recognize you as nothing but a sham, a superficial loser. After all, you jump from relationship to relationship, never fulfilled, always needing more. Grasping to relationships and making people to be anything more than sprinkles spells disaster and ruin and a dash of humilation. You don't want to do that. Don't have feel affected by or attached to people. Ever.

What happens when we treat others simply as sprinkles in life?
Our life flows. People cease to present themselves as obtacles and have so little impact on us, that we "choose" how to interpret their impact. You can't even taste the flavor of a sprinkle, but we always "choose" to interpret the sprinkle as a positive addition to the cake-eating experience. The same will be true of people in life. They'll be like the tasteless sprinkles, a great bonus, but utterly something negligible. People will gape in awe at your confidence and seeming indifference to their company. This functions as a demonstration of higher social value. Women are biologically wired to seek out men with a higher social value to ensure the survival of her young. That's unconscious programming working with you. Men will recognize your confidence and ease in life and look to you as a leader. After all, if you act so fulfilled and confident, you must "know something". But you mustn't lead and you mustn't cling to any of the many women that present themselves to you. Again, always treat people as sprinkles. Have sexual relationships with women -- some of the best. Have business relationships that feel the most rewarding, but never cling.

Examples of this in real life.
Watch some old westerns. What key characteristic do you notice of the protagonist -- the cool cowboy hero? Is he running around clinging, screaming about things he needs? No. He's always the guy, perfectly calm, perfectly content. The hero treats people like sprinkles, with negligence; the hero believes in himself and no one else; the hero survives because of those principles. Here's a GREAT explanation. Treating people like sprinkles shows indifference and most importantly the absence of neediness from others. People with higher social value don't need things from others because they already have things, so acting not needy (or like people are sprinkles) is a demonstration of higher ocial value. Even of you dont' HAVE higher social value (if you actually DO need things from people), treating people like sprinkles, and, thus, conveying a DHV will cause people to look to you as the person with the higher social value and will treat you like that. They'll present opportunities to you because, (after all you conveyed the genuine DHV!) seem to have access to the resources for their neediness. I really spelled it out there: but in short, People are sprinkles ---> ----> Shows absence of neediness ----> DHV ----> People present opportunities to you because of your apparent DHV.

So all you have to worry about. The only tricky part is maintaing the sprinkle principle WHILE taking the good opportunities and/or relationships without clinging. Read The Alchemist and you'll know what I mean when I say, such an act is like seeing the beauties of the city without spilling a drop of the oil in the spoon. You, obviously can only make two errors with these opportunities. You 1)relinquish your negligence, become like a kid in a candy shop, and your DHV plummets and you lose the opportunities or 2) you keep the negligence, but it's too icy so you never take nor profit from any opportunities. If you don't ever do any of those faux pas, and keep the people-negligence attitude, you're guaranteed success...more accurantely, you're biologically WIRED for success!

This theory operates in congruence with our intrinsic biological survival patterns. In primitive days, women mated with those who had higher social value to ensure the survival of her kids (it's a 9-month time investment for each for her, remember -- she biologically has to choose wisely). Additionally, men hunted and gethered with those with higher social value to ensure their own survival. Treating people like sprinkles, ups your value in both the survival and replication goals of life!

6.03.2007

2 Types of Pursuits & 4 Types of People

Blaise Pascal said there are 2 types of people in the world, those seeking god (providing rationality) and those who have found God (providing happiness) Of that, you get this:

Neglecters -- don't seek God (irrational); don't find god (unhappy)
Fantasizers -- don't seek God (irrational); do find god (happy)
Seekers-- seek god (rational); don't find god (unhappy)
Believers -- seek god (rational); do find god (happy).

I don't want to be a fantasizer with (not saying that acting is godly at all, but...) acting. I don't want to have this pretend conception that I harbor of being an actor or a musician within a fantasy, where I go out to bars to "act", but have no recognition or credentials for it (on the other hand, that's better than not trying at all, for sure, though). I want to be a believer and achieve my success in what I want and what's best for others, too, while not abandoning things that have kept me clear in the past, like computers and teaching.

2.05.2007

Do I listen to other people?

A lot of people have asked if I receive directions well? If I listen well and can easily apply things that others suggests.

Let me explain this.

I listen VERY well if the message is profound. If the messenger has deep conviction. If the requester or the messenger has fully considered what the situation is like from my shoes. If the person is delivering the message from a completely selfless stance, then I listen and react and act almost instantaneously.

Unfortunately, when people speak from a conceited, inflated ego and act like they can swoop down and dash on a cure-all for me, I don't listen. Also, most people are selfish and request things that benefit only them, so I don't listen to those either. Finally, most people aren't fully uncertain about their requests, so I don't listen in that sense either.

Ask yourself. Do you possess 100% certainty? Are you selflessly examining the situation from his/her shoes? Does your message possess profound poignancy? If all those are true (certainty, poignancy, selflessness) it's guaranteed that person will respond almost instantaneously. Let's put it this way. I hope to be responding even more, very quickly.

12.09.2006

Poignant Persons of Other Realms

Despite the bizarreness of the interrogation and the fact that this inquiry ranks quite highly on the "oddity scale", you should ask this.

I guess you have to ask it now.

This is quite an peculiar inquiry. However, while some irrationally classify it as mystical, Oiji board, cheesy BS, this communication is practiced by highly-successful individuals. The practice is staying in touch with those who've transferred to different realms. Do you still communicate with dead relatives or close friends? Do you check in and share your news or ask for advice.

Think about it logically. If 1)They are listening, you've maintained a connection; and 2)If they aren't "listening"you atleast have helped vocalize and articulate an achievement or resolve a dilemma.

It's dangerous to sever yourself from poignant persons of the past -- living or "in another realm". While psychological bereavement, moving on and all of those elements of departure are necessary and valid, you also can't do the the other extreme and say, "Just another bloke who had to croak". You can strike a healthy, enriching balance between staying connected and moving forward. A lot of successful, emotionally-centered people may not exactly co-exist with friends and close people that have simply changed realms, but maintaining that conncetion, checking in, sponsors prolifically enriching growth.

2.03.2006

The Deliberates (Warm) and the Festies (Cold)

At the apex of linguistic mastery, there emerges two distinct and corresponding methods of correspondence. One is not better than the other; neither is good nor bad, just dichotomous. The first conversational temperate is the deliberates. They are the Tony Robbins, the James K's. Their element is the earth -- the tree. They are calm, warm, slow, deliberate, Oak-like, in demeanor, and their words are the essence of the person's message. Note that, even though they depict the opposite of Cold feisties, they are not "hot" because hot connotes waspish and viciously quickness. They maintain stability by recieving a few blows, making their roots strong, and enduring despite some hardships and weather. How to interact with them (beating or dancing with) them: these guys are not marvelled by fancy footwork, but by the right usage of words. The right diction will achieve victory and comradeship with subtle footwork or all excessive footwork playing on the weakness, would be easiest

The other type are the feisties. They are the Basketball players, the Alex Ekmans, the Mike Maizels (maybe). Their element is water -- the ocean. They are feisty, agile, limber, cutting, icy, and quick. They are the instigators, the provocateurs, who insult and then compliment, throwing in slapshot comments to get people off balance, but then interjecting incredibly poignant praise. They are more deceivous than the deliberates, but equally as socially competent. They maintain their stability not with firmly planted roots, but with being able to dance around, avoid, evade, and dodge attacks, and move quickly with agility. How to beat them or befriend them: play on their strength, keeping up with the fast-paced dialouge, but then deliver a poignant deliberate mentality. Because they are very serious, the best method for interaction is realizing that excessive seriousness tends to cause myopia, so use gentle, mocking humor that is ontop of a narrow, but serious, focus.

I remember encountering a "feisty" in the suana once. I was sitting in there relaxing, having a calm conversation with a person, and talking about some pretty philosophical stuff -- creating ingenuity with passion to resolve a strength. In walks a "feisty", decked out in full long-sleeved clothing (warming up for a run), heard a few sentences, and then interjects, "You've got to stop smoking dope." I said that I wasn't interested in drugs and then shut up, kind of stunned that he had said that when I was so interested in health and non-drugs and the vitality of that certainty. What would have been a good strategy would have been to respond with a feisty comment to show that I could play that game, and then ease back into the deliberate mentality. Tactically, I could have responsed, "Nope, I'm clean as a whistle, monkey boy." Throwing around jargon and phraseology about not being on drugs and then commenting on how ridiculous he looked in the sauna, would have counteracted the comment.

Of course I, like George Costanza, can't think of these comebacks on the fly, but it is something I am working on.

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