About Changing Other People

I want to help other people -- -if they’re behind in IT, I want to give them a boost to becoming more internet savvy. If they want social, interpersonal change I provide the opportunity to flush out doubts and insecurities and heal old wounds. If they want motivation, I have got thousands of quotes and inspirational speeches and blurbs. However, I was trying to do ALL of that – techie savvyness, interpersonal change, and motivation to people who didn’t want that. For example, I believe psychological diagnoses are incriminating. If you watch Patch Addams, One Flew over the Cuckoo’s Nest, and even Requiem for a Dream you can quickly see the powerfully destructive effects of medicinal and psychological intervention to a person’s growth. Now, I put a lot of time into trying to convince an actual psychologist of that. Like talking to a brick wall. “People always fear change,” says Bill Gates. He points out they feared electricity, coal, and gas-powered engines because those technologies meant change. Well, the emergence of a neglected inner vitality causes a lot of change, and like new technology, people are resistant and fear that as well.

Don’t put your energy into something without a welcoming, otherwise your efforts are not heard. As a result, I’m realizing 2 things 1) Don’t waste your time trying to upgrade, heal, or inspire when people don’t welcome it (and don’t feel guilty about not doing that; trying to do so is just banging your head against the wall) 2) Never judge the efficacy of your work from an interaction with a person who isn’t interested in that change; you’ll always paint a bad picture for yourself. Judge the efficacy of your work with people whom welcome your process and teaching. Then you’ll shine.